Okay, if your coming to the meeting, COOL.  AGAIN, here is the directions to the meeting.

http://www.mapquest.com/maps?city=Lake+Worth&state=TX&address=5920+Quebec+St

Bring something to write on and with.  This is not a social gathering [ okay, after all the business is done it is], I will not allow any shenanigans [heh] during the meeting, once we are done talking technical, then it is okay.  I am only wanting people who are serious about this.  A lot of major decisions will be covered.  I appreciate EACH and EVERY one of you.

Lets take DFW by storm!

5920 Quebec Street
FORT WORTH, TX 76135-3605
Phone: 817-237 2894
Fax: 817-237 2896

God Forbid [By Raechel A. Gasparac]



Voices are crying
politicians are lying
Oh what a trap this could be
a change made by little me
the people are trying
the people can see
the innocents dying in the streets.

God Forbid
God Forbid
God Forbid
God Forbid

We must take action!
Buy into this distraction!
Neda is Bloody and fallen!
The people have spoken when-
we watch these comming attractions
As the innocence of the world has been stolen
Truth is that violence never defeats.

God Forbid
God Forbid
God Forbid
God Forbid

One day these people
will should out in victory
your small little steeple
will crumble with each decree
Your buildings will topple
will know you are contradictory
to each and every god and nation
of what you claim to be
The truth is the truth
will set you free
and

God Forbid
God Forbid
God Forbid
God Forbid
God Forbid
God Forbid
God Forbid
God Forbid

Now realizes not everyone can act like an adult.  stabby stabby.  URGH.  I tried my best.

My Etsy Store:

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=7302748

So much is going on.  I am trying to keep my head level, and hope I can accomplish a lot of things.  I hope I am not going to screw things up.  I had one minor setback, but I’m sure it is not as dire as I make it out to be.

Things are great with Dustin and I.  Wonderful in fact.  He takes care of me, and I hope I take care of him enough.

I cracked, and ate a hamburger.  I didn’t throw up, so my body isn’t rejecting meat like it used to be.  The bad news is, I broke out horribly afterwards.  Okay, not horribly.  I got more than one pimple, so for me that’s a horrible breakout occurrence.  nonetheless, I am going to minimize the meat i eat, and maintain mostly a vegetarian diet.

All together, things are great though.

Like I said on my Myspace blog, I may very well fail miserably at this, but I want to at least attempt to make this happen.  I am attempting to formulate a ‘Repo!’ shadow cast.  I’m thinking friday night performances, so Rocky Horror with LB will not conflict.  There is technically a Dallas cast, but they are no further than I am now, SO I will be making this another DFW Repo cast based in Ft. Worth.

I’m doing it for the love of Repo, and performing.  I miss it, but I do not feel like returning to rocky.  SO this is a good second chance I guess.

Like I said, I may fail horribly, but at least I will give it a damn try.

I have a few people I can already count on.  I’m just curious how many others will.  Here’s hoping.

I have been facebooking and twittering too much, therefore ignoring my blogging.  I know, I fail at life.

Things are going well for me.  I have been playing the game “Alice” as of late.  It is nice and creepy.

I have been talking a Dustin on the comp. and in texts a lot lately, so much of my random musings are forwarded strait to him.

We are doing another movie night tonight.  We will see which films we choose.  BUT its all good

Not sure what else to report really.  I’m sure there will be another big blog coming, I can feel it brewing, it is just a batter of time that it boils to the surface.

Dustin and I are now Dating.  It feels weird.  It has been a while.

I have gotten a lot done screenplay-wise. AND  I have been thinking a lot about my romantic thoughts. Go figure, who doesn't this happen to?

Still have not received a call regarding RENT.  I don’t blame them.  My audition was horrible.  I had to start over Out Tonight because i could not hear the piano [even though it was loud as all hell] and I messed up the words for take me or leave me.  I wouldn’t give myself a callback.

ANYWAY, this just means I get to write a lot.

Also means I get to go to The Church [Goth club for those of you who are out of the Dallas Ft. Worth Area] again with Dustin and Tora.  It will be much fun.  I [in an odd way] feel like dancing.  Which is odd, because i don’t like bringing attention to myself… because when i shake my hips, most people notice.  I’m not bragging, and I'm not a prude.  I just really don’t like attention at all.  I can’t help it.

Not sure what else to talk about really.  I’m just here at the back of the hall… just on my computer with no internet… going through the motions.

Y’ know? I’m glad all the friends i have are good ones…. even those that I have never met in person and developed friendships on line… all of them are great friends.

The oddest part is I am keeping up with their lives.  WEIRD. Usually I am horrible at it.  but I guess they are JUST THAT AWESOME.

It’s almost nine, with NO callback for RENT. Oh well.  That means I can have more freedom this summer.  God, I’m a college student who does not like going out and partying during the day… I do it all at night.  God, I sound like a such a Goth. 

I don't think I could ever consider myself a Goth anymore… I like to Just Keep Swimming. Also, when I go there, I know I am not one of those little wannabe’s out there trying to get people to pay attention to them, Dustin and I like to hang out on the top balcony of the dance floor and simply watch the ants dance.  It gives you a powerful feeling.

This is turning into a VERY long post, and I am sorry for that, but not really.  lol.  YOU WILL TAKE IT!!!!!

I know at least two people find my little blurbs on life interesting to say the least.

My mom is such a great actress.  I wish she did it more when she was raising me.  She used to always do community theater before she had me.  I am happy she was around, but it made her SOOOOOOOO happy. 

Sorry, sidetracked/  Wait, did I really have a point?  lol

Well, I could always go back to romance.  Who doesn't like hearing about it? [me?]  Photocopiedheart put it best.

“It’s like in those movies where her best friend has loved her for as long as he has known her and she just never noticed he was there until the last minute. and then is all like OMG, I LOVE YOU!  YOU WERE THE ONE MENT FOR ME ALL ALONG!!!”

Okay, it is 99% not like that. I don't like using the word LOVE casually like that.  That word has the power to make or break any situation.  lol

But no, I’m not head over heels as to say currently, but I feel he is at least worth finding out if there is anything behind it.

URGH, this just caught me so much by surprise.  I was just hanging out with a friend.  lol  I guess that is just how things like this work.

OH I forgot, I was going to post some pictures on here.  Think I'm going to do it vagina_salad style.  EVERYTHING AT ONCE.

I’ll start with Texas Frightmare Zombie Walk.

My Photographer MOUSE RAMONE is the guy in the Cowboy hat.

Me Meeting famous people at Texas Frightmare

Jason Mewes of Kevin Smith Fame [Jay of Jay and Silent Bob] he is hotter in person. me=schoolgirl

Me and ‘Sherriff Wydel’ in House of a 1000 corpses

Blurry pic of me and Mama Firefly [House of a 1000 corpses and Devils Rejects]

Last one is Alice Cooper getting a Lifetime Achievement Award

Me as Harley Quinn with my Best Friend Stephanie as Poison Ivy

Things I did in painting class

Me with no makeup in 1, 3,and 4. 2 is me before heading out to the church last week. 1 is the hair after a SLIGHT bleaching. Should have done more. rest is with purple hair.

My friend Tora Modeling one of the Steampunk Skirts I made.  The Purple dress in the background is my latest work of art. and the background is my room.  I have too much stuff.

Pics I took of my mom.

This was the Chalk about it competition, where the first pic is what they left it as, the second I filled in the rest.  I was in the hot sun for an hour and a half.  I was not about to let the Creative Arts Club [who held the competition] have such a sucky rectangle.

Two of my best buds, my versions of Monica and Pheobe. [Stephanie and the Tora]

Stuff from the backyard and home.

I made this.  :D

9:30pm, still no word from RENT.  It was a nice dream to have.  :*(

I did not expect this.

I was just going to hang out with a friend and watch some movies.  Instead not really watching movies and talking for six hours.  yeah.  SIX

He’s always been a really good friend i trust, and I never thought I would start to have feelings for him.  OR Have I always had feelings, and they just chose now to come about?

I guess being alone in the dark with someone does that.  Granted nothing happened, but the way the conversation flowed… it just didnt seem like two friends hanging out.

I Don’t know.  I’m willing to give him a chance, even though if this does not work, it ends up ruining a wonderful friendship…

He was always on the outside when I was with one of my exes, and always snapped them back in line when he was around.

He also disclosed to be about a week ago that he had a thing for me back in the day.  A big thing.

[sigh]

I could talk forever how bad things could be if things do take off.  BUT How much better things would be if it went right.  How perfect would things ever be?

BUT I don’t want to look into the future.  I’m move curious about now.

“I neva look bac dahhling, it distracts from the Nouw.” – Edan Mode [Incredibles]

Twitter has kept me from posting on here, and I apologize.

A lot has been going on.  I auditioned for the role of Mimi in a local production of RENT here in Dallas. Won’t find out until the 21st.

Other news… in 3 years after I finish school, my Friend Dustin and I are [drum roll] planning on moving to Europe.

I figure this is the only way i will get off my ass and do it.  I trust him, and i wont get taken advantage of my anyone there, because he looks like he would kill anyone he wanted to at the slightest inkling.

Super good news for all my friends over the pond.  I will get to visit you all.

We want to live in a place that is kind of in the middle of all the best cities,  but we are willing to live on the railway as far as spending time in the cities that make up happy.  Anyone want to inform us on the best places to live?

Again, this is still just a plan as of now. It is tentative on people not getting knocked up, or married.

We are also thinking of maybe adding a third person.  BUT have not decided on anyone yet.  We have a good idea though.

Though I know I will need to pay Vagina_salad a visit since she is wicked amazing, and Dustin want to see Dublin and never leave.  We will see how things go.

I am already not liking this semester ending.  I am still in bed [I love Lap Tops], and have not gotten dressed yet.  I woke up and still had the headache as the evening beforehand.  I’m almost certain now that it is just a sinus headache, since i have run out of Zyrtec.

I am going to the Church Thursday.  I have not been to that Goth club [in Dallas for my friends not in Texas] in i think four years…  I could be forgetting an instance…. I’m going with Justin and Tora.  We will also meet up with Emily once we get there.

I’m thinking of making up some cards for myself.  That way if I meet anyone I can network with all I have to do is give them a card… yes I will do this.

Blah didy didy blah blah…

Sometimes I feel so very much a freak of nature.  I never look at it in a negative way though.

Sometimes I am amazed at my intuition, most of the time i get what I don’t want to hear. Other times I find I’m dead on.  I consider myself a flight risk when it comes to intense high emotional risk situations. What are those situations? ha, that’s for you to worry about.

I can honestly say I am in the best mental state I have ever been [does that mean I’m in a bad mental state?].  I may have some severe weaknesses, but I am starting to learn to use them to my advantage, turn them into strengths.

I also like all my available options right now.  In several avenues of my life I find many people I can pursue for different things.  Something I never thought I would be able to do… but… I am finding it easier and easier stand up for myself and say “no” when it is fitting.  I am proud.  I deserve the best in life, and when someone offers me less than what I deserve, then there is no need to proceed.  That is something my mother has told me throughout my life.   I feel like I can do it now.

Many times in the past I would just let my wants and needs be put aside, in order to help someone else in their life path [and to make them happy, hoping they would return the favor… still waiting].  Most of the time these people would be my now exes… tricking me into pushing the pause button on things I cared about because what was on their plate was more important.  Just because I care for you does not mean I come second.

Though I feel like I need to say something… I rant about my exes a lot I find, but one of them needs be put pointed out for being the exception.  He was a good boyfriend, fantastic even.  When we broke up I thought it was the end of the world, because I was still VERY immature… and so foolish.  Truth was, he was one of the best people I have ever became friends with.  he takes care of people he cares for.  He has never messed with my head, and has always tried his hardest to do good.  He is known as English/ Chris/ Christopher [to his mother Annie, who is the main reason he is such a good human being].  He has been and always will be the exception to the exes I mention.  I can honestly say he is one of the best human beings I have ever met.  I have found we work much better as friends.  But only time can help you see strait.  He has been dealt some harsh blows in life, and I only wish his pain could be eased.  Of all people he deserves to be happy.  He and his mother are proof that European people are more my type of people.

Being the hippie-liberal-Obama loving-Geek-nerd I am, I am amused at the little turns life has taken to me so far.  It seems Karma is finally turning out in my favor.  Now I have some choices to make… all roads lead to happiness who wins? apparently I win in every instance.  sweet.

eeny meeny miney mo….

What brand of underwear you wearing?
I was wearing my victorias Secret ones… Don’t remember this brand.

How often do you shave your legs?
When I remember to. Yes, I forget.

How many times do you wear a pair of jeans before washing them?
Until I notice I’ve worn them before.  I’m guessing that’s 3 or 4 times

Do you always wash your belly button and behind your ears?
Always behind my ears

Ever kiss someone who was dating or married to someone else?
nope [at least I don’t think so…]

Ever been paid for sex or a sexual favor?
no. why are you asking?

Have you ever egged someones house or car?
it is a right of passage.  It was okay, they got me back

Ever taken diet pills?
oddly enough not to loose weight.  I did it in high school to try and become a better student.  Hey, I didn’t say I was smart in high school

Last time you washed your car?
you mean to tell me, water does not take the paint off? huh… who knew…

Have you been fired from a job?
never have

Have you ever had an abortion?
thousands.  No, never had one.

Did you vote for George W. Bush?
NO NO NO NO NO 

Have you ever stolen something from work or school? If so, What?
I seem to steal pens without knowing I am doing it

Ever purposely made yourself throw up?
no.  I don’t like the way throwing up feels.  So I try to avoid being nauseous.

Last time you played with yourself?
uhh, how about brain teasers?  heh heh

Have you purposely flirted with a friends crush?
nope.

Worst drug or substance you have used or abused?
…

How often do you drink alcohol?
socially, or when friends or parents want you as entertainment for the night.  lol [funny story]

Do you own a dildo or vibrator? If so, what color?
So, Hi mom.  How are you doing today?

Ever cheated on your taxes?
If I did, blame my tax guy.

Have your parents ever been in trouble with the law?
dont think so, but my mom has had a very colorful past…

Have you taken money out of the offering plate at church?
no. never crossed my mind really.

Ever stolen your neighbor's newspaper?
no. never cared enough

Have you video taped yourself being naughty?
dont think so lol

Ever been involved in insurance fraud?
i wish! [Vagina_Salad puts it well]

Last time you went to a strip club or nudie bar?
I was still with Wes

Have you ever stolen candy from a baby/kid?
no

Ever siphon someones gas?
that would involve me caring enough to.

Would you date an ex-con?
depends on the reason he’s in.  If it is for Raping babies, I dont think It could last very long….  lol yeah, no.

Have you ever stuck anything up your butt?
LMAO!!! I am so happy I did not read ahead in this survey!

Ever tried to make a bomb?
no, I would end up blowing myself up.

Are you friends with any strippers?
When I worked at Electrique Boutique and went to strip clubs with Wes all the time.

Ever been involved in a hit and run accident?
no

Have you gotten a DUI or DWI?
no, it involves me being selfish enough to drive after having any alcohol.

Besides bills, what do you spend most your money on?
One needs money to spend it. Though I am fortunate to have a father who was very good with money who has retired comfortably, and is able to give me some cash here and there.

Have you ever collected unemployment?
no, because my ex employer told them I quit after they fired me thanksgiving weekend.

Ever stolen someone's lawn ornaments or decorations?
no but I have thought about it really hard.

Have you ever done anything vile to someone's toothbrush?
no, I would have to care about doing anything to it.

Ever trespassed on private property?
Even before Zack. talked me into it.

What is the worst thing you have ever done?
Taught myself to stop feeling.  I should have let myself feel.

For the longest time I seemed to coach myself into avoiding feeling any complex feelings.  Feelings that could one day hurt me, but that is not the subject. [Or is it?]

I built up this magnificent resistance to mushy feelings.  I cut them off at the pass, and was a professional at making fun of them.  Cutting a joke so wonderful it would force me to forget the subject matter.  Now it seems I am failing.  All those things I have worked so hard not to feel are pouring out. Granted, it was just a matter of time before I would break. 

I’m not even sure what the catalyst is in this little situation to suddenly make it impossible for me to keep up those perfect crystal walls around those emotions that force me to feel, and remember the pain that will eventually follow.  I don’t know what it is… but it is cracking those walls and they are crashing hard and loud around me.

The emotions creep up on me, before i even notice I am feeling them.  It does not sadden me, but it causes me to be shaken off balance… as if i forgot how to function as a human being.  That I am a robot forced to analyze and produce emotions after years of research on the subject.

Granted I have noticed them the most while watching things that I feel strongly about.

[Enter a severely geeky moment.  You have been forewarned.]

The first attack [that I remember or noticed] was the first time I saw Star Trek at the early preview screening I caught with some of my best buds.  The intro where Kirks father and mother have their goodbyes.  It made me almost break into tears.

If you know me [at least as far as I know of myself], I push myself away from moments like that, where i remember pain of the past [I never gave birth, but try to follow me here] and it is so fresh, burns and stings at your insides like a thousand needles ramming through your chest, making breathing hard.

I chalked it up to great cinematography, being the film and Star Trek buff that I am. Then AGAIN being the geek I am, I viewed it again with the parents.  This time I cried.  I really cried.  I cannot remember the last time I let myself feel the hurt from all those broken hearts… letting them consume me for a few moments.  It was odd.  I was not depressed.  I was still my current self, not the stupid stupid girl that lets the guy dictate her worth, and not the one that made those allowances for hurting her. Breaking promises, and frequent excuses.

It was me letting myself feel again. 

Even though it was so painful, I welcomed it.  In a weird way I missed being able to let myself feel.  I have been so scared of letting people in for so long, maybe now I can honestly LET them in.  I don’t think I have even let Stephanie 100% of the way in… not even my own mother knows all of the conflicting bits of information in my cluttered mind.  Stephanie is close though.  I sense she feels and thinks of the same happiness, and demons as I do.

The most recent experience of feeling was again a geek moment.

I was watching the scenes for the next upcoming Dr. Who [which I have already seen three times with no effect].  It is the episode where Rose “dies”.  The doctor does not even get to tell her that he has loved her all along.[Though he comes SO very close to- just a second too late]

[I know she mentions a baby, and plays it off as her bothers.  BUT in my little fan girl way I see her wanting to tell him she is with his child…. but that’s strays from the point.  Or does it?]

It was just the clips of that episode, and I was crying heavily.  I was feeling all of those emotions I kept locked up.  I never thought I would be able to feel again. 

I have been wanting to act and feel like a normal person for a while now, but I forgot how.  I am trying to remember how to show my emotions to others around me.  hmmm  I seem to have a lot more issues than I once previously thought.  No worries though, it does not sadden me, it just emphasizes I am human.  I am constantly learning new things about myself.  Though I wish for one thing, to stop wishing to be more than what I already am.

I doubt I could loose any more people with this blog post, so I will stop now.

My eyes are hurting from being on the computer all day.

Did a lot of writing .

found the best internet resource for filmmakers

found and installed the worlds best FREE software for filmmakers, that makes me cry happy tears.

I just noticed I have not eaten today

I’m exhausted but happy

have to decide what I’m doing this summer with my free time

I will go now.

I started the discussion/ argument on facebook, and it got me happy, so I am also giving you guys a chance to weigh your thoughts.

REMEMBER

1.]Vampires and zombies need humans for food

2.]vampires cannot be infected with any type of disease because of their biological makeup

3.] If you take a stance defend it.  Others may try to disprove you.  remember your answer is right because you have veto power.

NOW… DEBATE!

Be honest, who were you texting a little while ago?
Morgan from Art club

Do you think you can last in a relationship for 3 months?
yes

What is something that you realized today?
I am  an actual artist… wow.

Do you think anyone has feelings for you?
yes.  a few.

How late did you stay up last night, why?
two.  PBS britcoms

Have you ever ridden a horse?
yes

You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life, what is it?
water.

Have you held hands with anyone in the past 24 hours?
:( no

Are you a patient person?
too much so

Are you afraid of death/dying?
not really…

How's your heart lately?
put together again. waiting for the next fall of the hammer to it tho.

When was the last time you cried?
Don’t know, ask Steph, she is always picks me up when i have a low spot.  It seems to have been quite a while now since.

Think a lot before you fall asleep?
too damn much.

What do you think your number 1 is doing right now?
on myspace? Stephanie?  complaining about her neck hurting.  She had a mole removed from her neck and is in pain.  :(

Do you enjoy late night phone conversations?
i effing LOVE them

Were you happy when you woke up today?
sure was.

What was the first thing you did when you woke up?
…went back to bed…. lol then remembered i needed to get up.

What were you doing at 8 this morning?
sleeping BLISSFULLY

What are you excited for?
everything.  i mean, i have so much going on, and i am so busy, BUT i have never been this happy before.

Do you have curly hair?
No, wavy.  I sometimes strait iron it.

Are you mad at anyone right now?
nope.  Not even myself!

Do you live on your own?
nope.

Would you like receiving flowers or do you think that's tacky?
the sarcastic side of me makes jokes about it, but on the inside, the hopeless romantic swoons.

How have you felt today?
tired, exhausted, and blissfully happy.

Are you happy at the moment?
dear god yes.  to think a year ago i was not in a very happy mood…. wow, life changes so quickly…and for the better too.

What do you hear right now?
a fan blowing air on me

Where's your phone right now?
next to me, just got off the phone with Steph

Do you have any plans for the weekend?
lol no, im broke.  but i will probably find something to distract me from studying for my finals

Who was the last guy you talked to?
ummm, some guy in my drawing class who was critiquing my artwork [it was positive!]

How's your hair?
better looking than i thought it was right now.  lol

BLINK-BLINK

uhhh… hmmm. good question. wait… was I even alive this Thursday? damn, right.  I was.  then I don’t remember.

Who's the last person you had a deep conversation with?
Katie from my Drawing class

Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today?
yes. sure have.  Not going to tell you who!

Do you say sorry first?
depends on how stubborn I am at the moment.

Has someone ever made you a promise & broke it?
ALL THE EFFING TIME.. wait… I’m not with Wes anymore… HA HA, two years of people keeping their promises then.

Are you alone?
are we truly ever really alone?

What are you eating?
I ate some vegetarian ‘chicken’ nuggets with Ranch dressing

Last time you laughed really hard?
On the phone with Steph

Your ex calls you, what do you say?
I’m sorry, Raechel doesn’t live here anymore. “But this is her cell phone…” uhhh YEAH I know that… uhh… [Indian accent] thank you for calling tech support, we appreciate your business, and we will call you back at your provided number, thank you come again! [click]

Have you talked to a complete jerk today?
don’t think so, WAIT… no.

Want someone back in your life?
I think I will trust in natural selection.

What are you excited for?
being done with Finals

Are you scared to fall in love?
not going to lie.  Yes.  When I do fall, I fall hard, and miss some important red flags, and make too many damn excuses for bad behavior.  BUT It is when I felt most alive… and I’d be willing to do it all over again for the right person.

Do you think teenagers can be in love?
no.  They try so hard, like I did.  ENGAGED at 19!!!!!  WHO WAS I KIDDING!!!!!!!!

Do you find it hard to trust others?
not so much.  I don’t give people much of a change now a days.  Those who do have my trust have seen me at my worst, and still loved me, and picked me up. so those I trust have earned it.

Do you care too much/not at all/just enough?
I think I can balance the two just fine.

How fast does your mood change?
quick, but not bipoloar or anything.  If the right traumatic situation hits me, I can be a blubbering mess just as bad as the next person.  BUT if something blissful happens I can be on cloud 9.

I bet you miss somebody right now?
I’ve missed a lot of people.  and I still do.   A lot of people for different reasons, but yes.

Can you honestly say you're okay right now?
I don’t think I have ever felt more okay in my life. [as of yet]

A LOT of sexually oriented things in this hilarious music video, and a LOT of swearing, so this is RIGHT up your alley…

[pics of texas frightmare 2009 coming soon for my LJ peeps

got up at the crack of effing dawn ME at 6AM!!!  AM!!!!

Got to the sight of the zombie walk,shot that much fun…

Got to meet Jason Meaues [sp?] of Kevin smith fame

Got to meet Sheriff Wydell, & Mama Dragonfly from house of a 1000 corpses

I was at Texas Frightmare Con BTW… should have mentioned that…

Was walking around, and got cast as an extra in a horror film they were making at the hotel.  It is already slated for some important film festivals too.  I’m an extra at a party, with a lot of face time.  Apparently since we had to do so many takes, that the group i was with formed a silent routine.  I was bringing a date to the party, and having him meet my three friends, i then begin to tell him some stories of us three hanging out together, i get the girls approval that he is date worthy, when we realize one of the three people who are now known to us as not supposed to be there pulls out a gun and shoots one of the people at the party.  my “date” tries to shield me in case of more fire, and then we notice all three are killing people.  Two of them as stabbing people and one is shooting.  my “date” gets shot, while protecting me, and then the gun is turned on me, in which i turn out a brilliant performance if I do say so myself…. and then they begin to go about their own business, when one of the killers kills the other killer, in which he falls right in front of me, BUT you get to see MOI in the background. 

I got a lot of face time in that shoot.  I’m happy.  Can’t wait to see what they came up with.  Maybe next year I will audition for a main part!

NOW, I received a text message on my phone which is on my bed, that is calling my name.

Love you guys, will post more later.

[snores]

I am officially obsessed with the ‘Tweetdeck’ application you can get that basically merges your twitter and facebook account.  I have also enabled the 12 seconds video posting thingy.  SO  I also post videos on my twitter, and soon it will have a feature that automatically posts it to facebook.

The thing is there are some of my livejournal friends that I want to keep up with a lot on here, because it is strangely addictive, even if you have a life.

Two people I really wish had this… Bruiseme_please [did I put the underscore in the right place?], and Vagina_Salad.

These are only two of the wicked awesome people I would love to waste away life with on Tweetdeck.  SO, c’mon everyone's doing it…

I may have been watching too many movies, but….

A part of me expects when a cure for the swine flu comes around, it will kill those affected instead and reanimate the corpses.

Thus all my “needless” planning for a zombie outbreak will have reason, and I can laugh in my dads face and say “I told you so!!!”

Or, I just may have a fabulously creative imagination…

I have jumped headfirst into becoming more of a geek.  BUT  it is okay.

I am joining my friend with an idea him and another friend have had.  Okay, I want to post some Webisodes on youtube, but I didn’t have an idea of what to do.  SO  he told me about his little geekdom of wanting to do a series based off of Section 31.  Section 31 is the secret service of Star Trek, and is well known for bending the rules.

So, that’s the idea on the table for now.  Here’s hoping I actually get off my ass and actually do it this time…

more info:

Section 31 is the official designation of a covert secret police organization within Starfleet, which deals with threats to the security of Earth, and later the United Federation of Planets. Its operating authority stems from an oft-overlooked provision of the Starfleet charter — Article 14, Section 31, from which they derive their name — that makes allowances for bending the rules during times of extraordinary threats. While the original intent may have been to give Starfleet personnel some leeway when it comes to unusual or extreme circumstances, some Starfleet officials have taken it a step further in creating a standing organization able to respond to any threat, preemptively if need be. Section 31 might be compared to the Romulan Tal Shiar or Cardassian Obsidian Order, but operates much more clandestinely and effectively (and, unlike those organizations, does not interfere in the day-to-day lives of Federation citizens).

They defy the principles of the Federation in order to protect them, which is one of the reasons why Section 31 is not officially sanctioned by Starfleet, and even its very existence is not acknowledged openly. But the philosophy of protection at any cost that allows for Section 31 is employed officially by Starfleet in other venues, such as with the ultra-secret "Omega Directive," which gives captains almost unlimited authority to destroy the dangerous omega molecule, including violating Starfleet's Prime Directive of noninterference.

Think you have what it takes?

I was running 5 minutes late to a fave class, and I knew I could make it from the parking lot to the seat in less than ten minutes,so I would be within the 15 min window for arrival.  I reached behind my drivers seat to notice I had forgotten to grab my backpack in leaving the house.

SO

I get to miss a class I like because I’m groggy.  So, I will actually get to eat some breakfast this morning.  this is going to be weird…

Okay, in the middle of Drawing class, my earlobe started bleeding again.  The weird part, only my friend Katie even noticed i was bleeding, ALL OVER MY WHITE SHIRT.  It looked like I cut my artery.  I walked around the school, and not ONE PERSON noticed.  Sure I got it to stop bleeding when Katie shoved me into the bathroom to stop the bleeding [which stopped almost immediately].

The teacher was even on that side for most of the day, but DID NOT NOTICE.

WEIRD.  AND Yes, the ear is healing like it should be…  This should last time come to think of it.

Thank you rebelfilms!

Random Entertainy Thing

Just put your music on random, whichever song plays put in the first few lines of that song.

1. First thing you say every morning:

I see you sit
And swallow pain
For all of those
Who will not speak
You raise your voice
You fill the stage
Your eyes are wide
You know the weakness
That you've felt
Is not just yours
So many more
You're not alone
The song you sing is not your own
You fill the room with something real

[Flobots – Never Had It]

2. First thing you think every morning:

ooh - ooh - baby
it's to the best of my knowledge I guess that I'm fresh - so
ooh - ooh - baby
cause i got the diabolical sound coming through your speaker

[Mindless Self Indulgence – Diabolical]

3. What you say to your friends most often:

Switching on and off between Andre "3000" and "Bentley Farnsworth"]
[Andre]
Ahhh, such sweet sound
The Fiddler on the Fuckin' Roof
Is that Mr. Bentley Fonzworth?
[Bentley Farnsworth]
Indeed it is Sir
Good day, good sir
How do you do? Look fine
[Bentley Farnsworth]
Fantastically well
I am certainly not fine by far
But you could say
I'm close to spectacular
[Andre]
Close to spectacular? How so?
[Bentley Farnsworth]
Open your eyes
Spectacular's right in front of you

[Outcast – Good Day, Good Sir]

4. What do you say to the love of your life?:

Once upon a time
They called me the bleeder
Well swimmin' up this river
With sentimental fever
But this ain't my first ride
It ain't my last try
Just got to keep a-movin' on
If they catch me ever
They'll throw me back forever

[The Wallflowers – Bleeders]

5. What do you say/call your worst enemy?:

My last girlfriend didn't like me thought she might be,
Most likely a dyke she just didn't excite me,
Lefty? Yeah but that was alright,
She was hotter than the sun but she just wasn't that bright,
My mistake she was more flaky than a leper colony,

[Bloodhound Gang – Three Point One Four]

6. What do you say whenever you have a break up?:

Now I understand
What you tried to say to me
And how you suffered for your sanity
And how you tried to set them free
They would not listen
They did not know how
Perhaps they'll listen now

[Josh Groban – Vincent]

7. What did/do/are going to say at prom?:

Over time I've come to feel
That everything must come apart it seems
From the little child to the man of power
From the beggar to the angel of my dreams
From the thinnest thread we are sewn together
From the finest string we dangle over time
From the highest wire do we walk through fire
Should our balance ever falter
Should our steps be unaligned
Such a big storm yeah such a strong wind blowing
Such a loud voice calling for me to cross the line

[Oingo Boingo; Ghostbusters 2 soundtrack – Flesh and Blood]

8. Your view on life:

Last summer we took threes across the board
But by fall we were a cover story "now in stores"
Make us poster boys for your scene
But we are not making an acceptance speech
I found the safest place to keep all our old mistakes
Every dot com's refreshing for a journal update

[Fall Out Boy – Thriller]

9. What about mental breakdowns?:

Don't tell me to stop
Tell the rain not to drop
Tell the wind not to blow
'Cause you said so, mmm
Tell the sun not to shine
Not to get up this time, no, no
Let it fall by the way
But don't leave me where I lay down

[Madonna – Don’t Tell me"]

10. Thoughts while driving?:

Living a different way. You can't expect me to be the same.
Separating our lives and wondering why.
Face down I walk away. Every time I think I do the right thing,
you turn your back on me.

[Godsmack – Trippin’]

11. View on Religion?:

Shakedown 1979, cool kids never have the time
On a live wire right up off the street
You and I should meet
Junebug skipping like a stone
With the headlights pointed at the dawn
We were sure we'd never see an end to it all
And I don't even care to shake these zipper blues
And we don't know

[Smashing Pumpkins – 1979]

12. Getting back together with your ex:[HA!]
[LMAO BTW]

Mama,just killed a man,
Put a gun against his head,
Pulled my trigger,now hes dead,
Mama,life had just begun,
But now Ive gone and thrown it all away-
Mama ooo,
Didnt mean to make you cry-
If Im not back again this time tomorrow-
Carry on,carry on,as if nothing really matters-

[Queen – Bohemian Rhapsody]

13. At your wedding/friend’s wedding:

Hey there sugar baby
Saw you twice at the pop show
You taste just like glitter
Mixed with rock and roll
I like you a lot lot
Think you're really hot hot
I know you think you're special
When we dance real crazy
Glamaphonic, electronic, disco baby
I like you a lot lot
All we want is hot hot

[Lady Ga Ga – Boys Boys Boys]

14. Your final battle (be it emotional or physical):

I'm not like them
But I can pretend
The sun is gone
But I have a light
The day is done
But I'm having fun
I think I'm dumb
or maybe just happy
Think I'm just happy
my heart is broke
But I have some glue
help me inhale
And mend it with you
We'll float around]
And hang out on clouds
Then we'll come down
And I have a hangover...
Have a hangover

[Nirvana – Dumb]

15. At Death/Funeral:

Underneath the bridge
The tarp has sprung a leak
And the animals I've trapped
Have all become my pets
And I'm living off of grass
And the drippings from the ceiling
But it's ok to eat fish
Cause they haven't any feelings

[Nirvana – Something in the Way]

16. Last Thought before going to sleep:

I keep a close watch on this heart of mine
I keep my eyes wide open all the time
I keep the ends out for the tie that binds
Because you're mine, I walk the line

[Johnny Cash – Walk the line]

If you are reading this then you have to do it (it only takes a couple minutes I Promise!). Then, tag it back to the person who sent it to you and the rest of your friends!
Seven names you go by:

1. Star
2. Harley
3. Raechel
4. Rabid Zombie Bunny
5. Jezzele De Fatale
6. Raechelharleystar [morgan]
7. Harley-star [stephanie]

Three things you are wearing right now:
1.boxers
2.shirt
3. underwear

Three things you want very badly at the moment:
1. To be able to take a nap
2. watch cable TV instead of network tv.
3. My own pesonal Harem including Seth McFarlane, Josh Groban and some other third person I can’t remember right now.

Three People who will fill this out
1. Dumb
2. Dumber
3. Dumbest

Two things you did last night:
1. cleaned
2. read

Two Things you ate today:
1. Sweet Potato French Fries
2. Cheesecake Factory double chocolate cheesecake

Three things you are doing or did today:
1. Wished I was in Painting class
2. Wishing I was in Philosophy class
3. won a couple million dollars

People you last talked to on the phone:
1. Tora
2. Stephanie
3. Joshie

Two things you are going to do tomorrow:
1. Class -_-
2. Read

Your favorite beverages:
1. Hot tea or iced tea
2. water with lemon

Here's what you're supposed to do.... And please do not Spoil the fun.
Copy this note and paste in your notes. Delete my answers and type in yours.
Then tag a whole bunch of people you know INCLUDING the Person who sent it to you.

Not feeling up to school, so I am staying in bed today.

I still plan on hanging out with a new friend tonight tho.  I flaked on him last time, so I have to today.  lol

I planned on writing more, but I just want to curl up with a book right now…

Like I said, I had many things to cosplay Steampunk, so I went through my pile of clothes that are meant to be altered and all that jazz.  I then went into my fabric stash, and I threw together a Jacket that makes my heart soar.  I’m only halfway finished with it.

It started out as a faux suede “hippie” style jacket, cut off the sleeves, [which I will make an attachment to where it will be removable, and show off my shoulders] and added some black fabric with glittering gold paisley designs on it.  I then found some antique looking buttons I adorned on the front.

I went with gold because I was actually working on embroidery on the Jacket before this inspiration struck me.  I did a gold design on the back where the bottom is.  It works perfectly with it.

Yes, that IS my cat Pogo’s leg in the first one.[and my wicked awesome plaid PJ’s!]

I’m proud of myself.  I threw it together in less than an hour.  GRANTED I had already spent a few hours on the back beforehand… 

But remember it is not done. You can’t tell in these pictures, but there are still pins in it.  I will be altering the shape a bit to fit me in a more feminine way.  Also the fabric is not sewn down.  you guessed it… Pinned.

I am beginning to fall headfirst into the Steampunk world.   I was trying to avoid it, because i knew i would fall in love with it.

Sad to say, it is the style I have been thinking about for forever, and I figure it is just about time i get off my ass, and enjoy it.  Meet awesome likeminded people.  All that jazz.  Go figure.

Some things that make me cry happy tears….

It’s okay, I know I’m weird.  What is more weird, I used to hate ruffles with a passion…. I guess it is okay as long as it is tastefully done …  lol

That will be it for my daily blog.  Enjoy Easter!

So yeah, I was commenting on another friends journal, and I saw this in another comment, and it made me REALLY happy.

SO

HAPPY EASTER!  EVEN IF YOU DON’T CELEBRATE IT!

Well, I am QUITE proud of myself here. I do believe I created some art.  SQUEE!!!!!

I spent an hour and a half on the Model’s [one of my best buds] makeup, then 45 min on the hair.  It was all worth it. AND she did NOT end up looking like a porn star either!!! woooo!!

We took 339 frames, and we got more than half we can use.  [THO we dwindled it down to 74 shots to be submitted, the best of the best] 

Right now we are going thru the best of the best, that MUST be in the series.  She will be submitting them to staff first, instead of having the members of the site decide.  That way, she gets more recognition, and possibly more monies.

I will post pictures now.

These are scaled down a lot, and these are the set with her clothes on. [Ain’t I a stinker?] Some of you know who this is!!!  lmao

Okay, this is the response to my earlier blog…

The “Chalk About It”  thing went very well.   Thanks to me, Art club did not have a blob of shit to show for it.  I’m not trying to be egotistical… the art club president told me so.  She would have added to the square, except she was busy with her own.

There were only three other people in art club that showed up, and two [including the prez of art club] added anything to our square, so me being me, I doodled away for an hour or so and got our club second place.

It was hot with no Breeze, and I sweat five times my own body mass, and kept rehydrating.

I think I am getting back into blogging all day again…

HA HA

Skipping Psychology today 1] I know the material, and am making a B without having purchased the textbook 2] I can get my daily grade by submitting some writing to the teacher online anyways.

I am going to painting though.  I have one more Canvas to finish stretching, and find out [hopefully] if more than one piece of my artwork will be accepted into those competitions.  AND that class is ending early, so I will head over to the “Chalk about it” competition the art club is holding.  People are playing with Chalk in 6ft. squares to produce some art.  The winner takes in $100, BUT I am not competing, I am just going to be there to help the art club with their square.

[I’m happy because I’m listening/ watching Invader Zim on Nick.com.  I have the entire series, but I don’t want to get out of bed just yet.]

Then my buddy Morgan and I [she’s also in art club] get to FINALLY go to Philosophy together.  She hated her A.M class because everyone in there was whiny and complained that they were being picked on, even though people were just displaying their own beliefs.  SO after her and I wanting to have a class together, she switched over to my class.

I am also planning on starting to figure out what my art piece of a panda attacking downtown Tokyo will entitle.

THEN I will watch my Thursday TV stories.  Which reminds me, I need to catch up on my Days of our Lives.  Yes, I am part of the collective.  I started watching it in between semesters, and got hooked. 

Don’t know what else to talk about right now, but I’m sure I will be back, blogging again.

Okay, the reason I am thinking of returning to modeling temporarily is a girl I saw on deviant art.  Now, when she was being herself she had some AWESOME shots, but god, when she tried to be sexy, instead of just being herself she ruined the pictures.  I have some of the pics here, and I will be posting them, so tell me if I am just being mean or not.  I plan on remaking some of these shots myself… urgh, having to do the modeling thing again, seems like a HUGE project that will require some photographers since my old one moved.